“You have to come see this.”
I follow my husband to his office window. I look out to see what has amused him so much that he is almost giddy.
Does this image seem familiar?
It is the Friends cast seeing “Ugly Naked Guy” for the first time. They aren’t the only ones to be both entertained and disgusted by the view from their window. As we look out of our window, my husband and I are getting our first glimpse at our very own “Ugly Naked Guy”.
The back of our house faces the side of our neighbor’s house. The distance between our two houses is the street and my driveway (which is a car length).
All of our windows have curtains that we open every morning and close at night. Our neighbor has left his dining and living room windows without treatments of any sort. The rest of his twenty-eight windows have paper shades. Why he left four windows without paper shades is beyond me. For twenty dollars, he could spare us seeing offensive UGLY NAKED NEIGHBOR.
The human body is beautiful, you say. Look at all of the famous paintings, by Renoir for example. Ahh… I believe they are all women. Let’s face it; the female form is far more beautiful and desirable to gaze upon than its male counterpart. What about the Statue of David? Okay, I’ll give you that one, but my neighbor is less like David and more like the neighbor on “Friends” – more of an eye sore. It makes you want to say “eww” ! And even if he was a beautiful woman or chiseled like David, I still do not want to see that view from my windows.
Our neighbor has his laptop, with a phone right beside it, set up on his dining room table. Every night he sits at the table working, in the light of his laptop. The only other light comes from the stairway right behind him. There is just enough light to see our neighbor in all his naked magnificence hideousness.
We can’t believe it. I want to hang a banner in my windows or from my balcony: WE CAN SEE YOU. PLEASE GET WINDOW TREATMENTS!
In the meantime, we close our curtains a little earlier, just to be on the safe side.
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